Gemma-Rose Turnbull

It is my sister’s birthday today. I spent the morning sitting in her backyard drinking champagne and orange juice, chatting and watching our Dad play with her son. It was a lovely way to start a Sunday. Then later I was driving to a friend’s house and saw a sign by the side of the road. ‘Happy Birthday Shaneo’ it read. And I idly wondered who Shaneo was, and what kind of person he must be to inspire a loved one to write a sign that would flash him on the way home from his Sunday lunch. It must have been someone who knew him well enough to know he would drive that route that day, or someone who engineered that he would. And then I though how nice a day it was to have a birthday, sweaty and sunshiney.

Later after a lazy, humid afternoon full of conversation with old friends I drove back past and noticed that the sign was double sided. And that on this side it was accompanied by a cross and some plastic flowers, gathered in the typical formation of a roadside memorial. My heart lurched. Shaneo’s loved one put the sign up in memoriam of his birthday. That spot was not chosen because he was going to drive past it and see his special birthday message, it was chosen at some point, by some strange and unfair hand of fate to be the spot Shaneo died.

As I drove past I felt so sad for the people who were celebrating his birthday without him. I felt sad that I had the luxury of spending the day with my loved one for her birthday and that they didn’t even have his body to hug and love. I kept driving, on my way to a dinner with my parents until some synapse in my brain fired and I swung the car around to go back to Shaneo’s memorial. I was twisted by thoughts of not wanting to upset anyone, unsure of why I wanted to photograph his sign. To be honest I am still unsure of why I wanted to photograph his birthday message but it felt important to celebrate his birthday in some way.

So Shaneo your birthday was a beautiful day. We took good care of it, filled it with lovely Sunday things like wine and fish and chips, and spending time with the people we love. As I haven’t yet determined a fixed position on these things, like what happens to our souls when we die, I’m not sure where you are, but I hope somehow you saw us enjoying your day and felt happy that we used it well.